And got a speeding ticket for going 47 in a 35mph zone. Guilty as charged. I take my lumps, pay the ticket, and opt to take Traffic School to keep the points off my license so my insurance rate don’t go up. I find a course I can take online, which is pretty sweet compared to the last time I went through this process way back in 1998.  You remember, back when you had to sit in some dilapidated hotel meeting room for 5 hours with people who haven’t showered for days and listen to a guy attempt to justify the class being marketed as a “Comedy” Driving School course. Trust me, if those were jokes, I’m George F’n Carlin.

I digress… I’m running through the chapters one by one. Each is 25 minutes long, with a little countdown timer on the screen. I’m finding it really hard to actually *read* the material. My web reading habits are so scattered, I don’t think I actually really read anything online anymore - I skim it. If I find something interesting I start reading until it loses my interest, then I go back to skimming. At the bottom of every section are three questions that you must answer correctly to advance. I quickly skim the first article, drop to the bottom of the page, answer all the questions using basic common sense and click next, then wait out the time to start the next section while catching up on Celebrity Rehab.

Not so. The program pops up Yes or No questions while you wait (Doh!). Questions like “Is your name James?” and “Is your license number XXXX-XXXX?” and “Do you live on Such and Such Street?“. Questions that are an obvious YES or NO, and if you don’t answer them quickly - the countdown restarts. Five hours of this. The whole web at my fingertips… TV, DVD’s, video games… all impossible while waiting for this timer to count down. Easily the most torturous online experience of my life, second only to the great AOL busy-tone epidemic of 1994.

Next time, I’m taking the points.

Sorry for the lack of postage on my part fellas, real-life work has taken the drivers wheel these past couple of weeks. It hasn’t all been lollipopin’ and dandelions for me though, I’ve been working on bringing the feeds back to you all in a much bigger way as well as working on a brand new look for the old blogaringadingdong. The current design was fine for the relaunch, but really wasn’t what i wanted (think simpler/less busy). That is, I wasn’t sure what I wanted this blog to look like until I got it back up, then I realized what I didn’t want - and you’re looking at it. New look coming soon, then the posting (on my behalf - Tower’s been doing great keeping the fort down despite a newly acquired Rock Band setup - congrats I’m officially jealous) will resume on a regular schedule. Thanks for sticking with us, it will be guns blazing with the new look. Natch.

• Oscar Leaks
Waxy (aka Andy Baio) collects the data on the amount of time it take nominated films to go from theater release to pirated online copy, proving once again that when it comes to the Internet - the tighter you squeeze the fast you lose your grip.

• Betting the Oscars
The odds are looking good for films ending in Country and Blood, not so much for the rest of the field.

• How Well Do You Know the Oscars?
I scored 16/25. Dare ya to beat it, sucka.

• Oscar Trailers
All of them.

• Nominated Live Action Short Films
All of them.

• Nominated Animated Short Films
All of them.

• Oscar Slumming
Slate takes us through the age old art of winning an acting Oscar, then immediately selling out in your next film.

• 80 Oscar Facts
Wish I had read this before taking that quiz.

• Sarcastic Oscar eCards
“There Will Be Blood is an unforgettable masterpiece I pray to god I never have to sit through again.” Love it, bitch.

My new web obsession is easily the Reel Geezers, hosted by Marcia Nasatir and Lorenzo Semple, both of whom are industry veterans, and both of whom are over 80. They are an anomaly on YouTube, land of fey-prepubescent angsty self-broadcast, where they release their video reviews for the latest in cineplex fare. Marcia is a producer with credits like The Big Chill, Hamburger Hill and Vertical Limit to her name while Lorenzo is best known as one of the writers of the original camp classic TV version of Batman. Their chemistry is fantastically charming and sometimes hilarious and their old-school analysis is refreshing. YouTube Channel, LA Times Article.

Be Kind, Rewind, Amanda Bynes
Is Michel Gondry’s upcoming Be Kind, Rewind a direct rip from Nickelodeon’s early 90’s The Amanda Show? You decide.

Quite Possibly the Nerdiest Thing Ever on the Internet
Besides the site you are currently reading, of course. More on topic, should we expect anything less from Star Wars prequel holdouts?

There Will Be Tacos
Brace yourself, this is the first of many. Related.

Juno Burger Phone
That’s right ladies - You too can be a self-confident, disaffected, trendy teen rebel with your very own plastic burger phone! As seen on the big-screen!

Forget the Film
A collection of animated film title sequences. Some of these are brilliant and a true art on its own.

Movies That Rhyme
Always remember: Movie fandom is serious business.

This must have taken forever. [via]

Every year around this time, like many film fans, I jot down my Oscar picks. More times than not I score fairly well - with my weakest categories almost always ocouring in the “shorts” categories (cause I haven’t seen them) and the sound/visual effects field (it’s like comparing one juicy apple to another juicy apple to me). This year I’ve decided to make my picks official and challenge anyone to best me in public!

For as long as he can remember, David over at Practical Madness has put together a slick new Oscar Pool tracking website every year, using the annual event to improve his coding, design, and usability skills. This years site is phenomenal both in looks and function. I’ve chosen David’s site as host of our first annual Oscar Pool. To participate:

1) Go here and register with the site. It’s quick and painless.

2) Go here and join the “FilmRot.com Readers Pool”.

Participating automatically enters you into David’s contest (he’s giving away unspecified gift certificates - maybe) and I’m also throwing in an additional prize for the best picker of our pool. To the winner goes the spoils - a $20 gift certificate to the online retailer of the winners choice. Picks must be locked in by 5:30 PM on February 24th - don’t delay!

If you had told me 12 seasons of The Amazing Race ago that I would still be watching the show I would have called you crazy. Surely watching strangers tramp around the world in a quest for adventure and greenbacks would eventually get old! If you had told me that I would be so addicted to the show I’d not only be hunting down an Asian only iteration of the show not even aired in the states, but also consider the latest season of said series the best of the lot, I’d call you crazy again! (Holy crap that was cheesy.)

Such is the fate of The Amazing Race Asia 2 for me. The first season of the spin-off show was pretty bland, but the latest season had all the players: A j-pop model and her jerkoff boyfriend, the stuck-up “moms” team, the handsome pack-leading “jocks”, and the mixed background couple who constantly bicker - loudly. There’s even a deaf guy. The music is the same, the mechanics virtually identical, only the cash prize has been downsized (the US version being 1 mil, Asia’s winner scores a tenth of that).

What really did it for me this season was three-fold:

1) Tons of cute non-annoying Asian chicks that can actually play the game (I’m a white-dude, cut me some slack).

2) A “jock” team that dominated while being genuinely funny and likable.

3) A surprise payoff ending not seen since the US versions’ season 2, in which Tara & Wil lose a finish-line footrace.

If you haven’t checked it out yet you should really track it down. Whoops!

From the ever-excellent web comic Elephantitus of the Mind. [Link]

Go here and re-watch (because I’m sure you have already seen it at least once) the recent Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. Now watch the international version of the same trailer here. Notice anything different? No? Watch them again, paying close attention to about the 1 minute mark. Still nothing?

North American Version

International Version

Imagine a world where Indiana Jones, the baddest-ass world explorer in the history of film, is being held against his will by soldiers who won’t even point their guns at him. That’s not very Indy-like Mr. Spielberg!